There's nothing quite like a mother's love for her child. We are happy when they are happy, we hurt when they hurt, we rejoice when they succeed, we grieve when they face defeat and we try to fix anything we can to make things better for our children. There is one defeat that parents of the class of 2020 graduates are just about helpless at and that is having to watch the gravity of the effect COVID-19 is having on their children's lives. This is especially true for the track moms who couldn't fix the abrupt interruption of this track and field season for their senior athletes. Yes, they realize this is bigger than running, but these are their children.
In talking to five mom's from across the state of Texas, Lori Wilcox, mother of Grant, senior at Plano East Senior High School, Lola Alvarez, mother of Pablo, senior at Frisco Liberty High School, Roselynn Ruth, mother of Alexandria senior at Fort Bend Marshall High School, Lucy Abeyta, mother of Michael, senior at El Paso Hanks High School, and Dana Embree, mother of Gabe, senior at Decatur High School their stories and feelings are all the same. Location or future plans of their children have not made the end of the track season, the end of their child's senior year any less painful. Their children's lives have been changed forever. According to Lola, "I am simply a momma from Texas who is witnessing my 18 year old son not being able to complete age appropriate and important milestones in a teen's life."
Mother's Feelings
As a mother, Lori wasn't ready for Grant's senior season to be over. "I've always envisioned "knowing" when I would be watching his last race. Soaking up every moment and capturing it with videos and pictures. It would have been very emotional, but a happy closure."
She feels this situation is just "SAD" because of watching kids train for months and months on end to reach a goal and then the opportunity just vanished overnight. She said, "it doesn't seem fair, but no one ever said that life is fair." Lori takes immense comfort in knowing that Grant has built strong relationships with teachers, coaches, and friends dating all the way back to elementary school and knows that these will remain despite the abrupt end to his Plano education. "No conclusion to his high school track career and possibly no formal graduation ceremony is a hard pill for a parent to swallow. My heart breaks for the kids still working so hard for better times in the pursuit of college scholarships." The one positive she sees from this is the extra family time they are gaining with him before he heads off to college.
"No conclusion to his high school track career and possibly no formal graduation ceremony is a hard pill for a parent to swallow. My heart breaks for the kids still working so hard for better times in the pursuit of college scholarships."Lori Wilcox
At first, the Embree family was in shock wondering how this could be happening in 2020 in a world so saturated with medical wisdom and technology. As they began to connect with loved ones across the globe, absorb the statistics, and hear about the dire realities we were facing as a human race; the shock turned to sadness. They were sad for all the loss of life and livelihood, there was already so much grief worldwide.
They were sad to miss Gabe's final shot at a 5k PR on the track at Texas Distance Festival (TDF), sad that he hadn't been able to run in his school's final meet in Aledo that week because he was prepping for TDF, and sad that he didn't get to enjoy celebratory hugs with coaches and teammates one more time. They were heartbroken that he might never wear the championship season jersey he had intended to wear, and that he might not get a chance to defend his district and area titles, that his chance to go up against the best of 4A in the region 2 championship in the hope of securing a shot at state was gone.
Dana states, "It was very real sadness, but it was balanced with our deep desire to remain hope filled through it all. We did not want to give in and lose hope. We are people of deep faith. We hold firmly to the truth that God remains in control and he will make beauty from the ashes of this life. He will take everything we surrender to him and use it for his glory." They knew this was especially true regarding their feelings about the abrupt ending of Gabe's high school running career.
As a photographer, Dana has been able to watch her son grow up in front of her camera lens. She has documented almost every race he has ever run. Her end plan was to have it all culminate as a championship season for the ages. Not being able to fulfill this goal hit her especially hard last week when Coach Park posted a picture of Gabe and three of his teammates falling into their coach's arms after they won state for the second time in XC. She said, "I began to cry, (ugly cry) right there in my office for the first time since this whole thing began.....this wasn't the way senior track was supposed to end. I was supposed to be photographing our seniors reaching their goals and posing with their medals."
Sadly, her camera has been gathering dust over the past few weeks as she's turned her attention to her sewing machine, making masks for their local hospital.
Lucy's feelings have ranged from disappointment to sadness to gratitude. She's disappointed that she's not going to be able to see Michael run on the track his senior year when it was going to be some of his best races, with his best times and living his best memories. The sadness comes from not getting to see him get ready for prom, run on his home track, stand atop the podium, or attend awards ceremonies. Despite all of that she feels grateful that she is getting to spend some quality time with Michael before he leaves in the fall for the University of Oregon. She said, "going from the Desert Southwest to the Pacific Northwest will be quite an adjustment."
El Paso Hanks senior distance runner Michael Abeyta and mother Lucy Abeyta
The El Paso Hanks track team is a very close group and important to each other. Lucy stated, "we miss his friends as well as his coaches for the sense of community they brought to our family." Each year the Abeytas would host a spaghetti night. Michael's teammates would come over. They'd eat, talk, play games, listen to music, dance, and watch movies. It was always a special and much anticipated event. Before the season was cut short, out of town track meets were a special family time for the Abeyta family whether it was Lubbock, Austin, or Dallas. With living in West Texas, the closest city for them is Lubbock and that's a five hour drive. One such trip was going to occur over spring break. They were headed to TDF in Dallas when plans changed dramatically. Michael was entered in the elite 1600m and had a goal in mind. He wanted to PR at a time of 4:10 or under since he had not run a 1600 all season and he was hoping to do this on the same track in which he'd run a personal best of 4:16 his Sophomore year.
Michael's sister, Andrea who runs at the University of Incarnate Word in San Antonio was going to be able to witness this as well since they turned it into a family vacation. Unfortunately, on March 12 TDF was cancelled due to Covid-19. Michael's coach immediately made arrangements for him to run in their local meet. At this time, El Paso meets were still on and Michael was entered in the 3200 on Friday and the 1600 on Saturday. As Michael was preparing to run the 3200, Lucy spoke with him and told him to "run as if it was his last race," little did I know that it would be. She states, "he ran that race with some of the top runners in the state and won with a time of 9:18." The next day El Paso's first case of Covid-19 was reported and the rest of the meet was cancelled.
It wouldn't be long until Andrea's collegiate season was also cancelled. She was given until the end of the month to get out of the dorm. The Abeytas made the eight hour trip to San Antonio and moved her home. "Just like that, her classes, track season, and life in San Antonio came to a halt," Lucy said. This has affected Andrea greatly as well. Last year, her team was 2nd in their conference and this year was looking promising. "Coming back home after having high hopes for our track season is disheartening," she said. Andrea feels she's been robbed of life experiences, making connections with people, and learning from those around her that she came in contact with while in a college setting. She feels the one positive that's come of the quarantine is appreciation for everything she has in her life. She stated, "it's given me another lesson on learning to adjust to different situations."
"I told him to run as if it was his last race," little did I know that it would be.Lucy Abeyta
As time moves forward, Michael continues to train with the hopes that this will be over soon and he will have the opportunity to run before his senior year is over, but reality is rearing its ugly head and it's not looking promising. He went from training with his teammates, to running with his best friend, to now running solo. As a mom, Lucy is constantly talking to him about his physical and mental state. "I talk to him about staying positive, staying the course, and looking towards his future," she said. Michael feels through this tragedy he's built a stronger relationship with God and is truly discovering who he is as a person.
Lucy says she misses taking pictures and videos of his races. She also misses praying with him before his races. "Praying helped him get centered and focused. It was always a special moment between mom and son that I looked forward to every time," she said. She really misses hearing him talk race strategy with his father before his races like how fast he would take out, what splits he had in mind and sometimes he wouldn't have any strategy at all. He just wanted to run and have fun.
Ft Bend Marshall senior sprinter Alexandria Ruth, mother Roselynn Ruth, and family
Life has changed for Roselynn and the Ruth family as well. They were in the middle of planning Alexandria's graduation parties, prom and enjoying her last year of competing in high school. All of the fun and exciting times you should be having with your senior child have now been put on hold. Roselynn said, "we will miss seeing her run in the large meets in Houston, like the Texas Southern Relays and the Victor Lopez Classic. These have always been exciting times for our family."
Alexandria is extremely positive and resilient. Physically she's doing all she can to stay in great shape daily and hoping the track season isn't over for the year. She had hopes that this year she'd end it as a UIL 5A State Champion. She misses her coach and teammates stating, "there's only so much Facetime a person can do." Fort Bend Marshall's track team is a very close knit group. Most of the kids have either run club track or school track since they were small children. "We are happy we get to have some family time with Alexandria that's not tied to track. She's normally super focused on her season this time of year," Roselynn said.
- - -
9-11 And COVID-19
High school seniors are now experiencing the same wave of emotions and uncertainty that their parents did many years ago. 9-11 was considered the deadliest attack on American soil until Covid-19. Almost 3,000 people died that day and it forever changed the way we did everything from traveling to sporting events and it forever impacted life as we knew it. New rules were put in place as protection and prevention much like life will be once we are past Covid-19.
This generation of kids were conceived and brought into the world in a very traumatic time and now, at one of the most impressionable times in one's life they are experiencing it all over again.
Pablo was born two months before 9/11. Lola was holding him in her arms when she saw the first plane crash into the World Trade Center. Today, she is holding him in her arms reassuring him that all is well and making sure he stays healthy. Grant was born less than a month before 9/11. Lori remembers holding him and watching morning television when the first plane hit the World Trade Center. She said, "I wondered what kind of world we had brought our first child into." Gabe's existence began in the week's prior to 9/11. Dana tells the story, "the morning I saw the first ultrasound pictures of his tiny unformed body was the same morning I saw the second tower come down on the screen in my OBGYN's office waiting room." She laid in bed for weeks on the verge of losing her fourth pregnancy the same way she'd lost her previous three. She continued to watch the television footage of the aftermath of the attacks. She said, "I know Gabe was bathed in adrenaline as I struggled to keep from miscarrying him." This is how Gabe's life began and now he is about to enter adulthood turning 18 on his intended graduation day. Once again, his life is surrounded by chaos. Dana believes that all the adversity in his life has pushed him to be a fighter and that he strives to excel in all he pursues.
Frisco Liberty senior hurdler Pablo Alvarez and mother Lola Alvarez
The Alvarez's have raised Pablo to know that adversity makes him stronger, to find positives in tough situations and to learn from these situations. "Loving a child during this time has made me a better mother. I have learned more from him than him from me." They always try to validate his feelings and right now they are going through a myriad of emotions. There is sadness, frustration, anger and fear of the unknown. Lola doesn't feel her son is being selfish in feeling this way. She can see how this interruption of his Senior year hurts him, but also sees how it is shaping his future. "Covid-19 will leave an important impression on his life, just as 9/11 did." Lola feels this generation has gone through so much more than we did when we were their ages and they still look forward to making this world a better place for other generations to come.
The unknown of this disease is what makes it so frightening. According to Johns Hopkins University, there are over 432,000 people that have contacted the CoronaVirus with almost 15,000 that have died. The virus is spread mainly from person to person contact. There is currently no vaccine to prevent it and the best way to prevent the illness is to avoid being exposed.
More info can be found here (National:CDC coronavirus site)
- - -
Athlete Perspectives
This was supposed to be Pablo's year! Getting his letterman jacket his junior year and being on the varsity team were milestones for him. He was looking forward to helping incoming freshmen, encouraging them and passing along what he had experienced during failure as far as how to keep your chin up and pick yourself up from a hurdle (literally) and doing it again and again.
Pablo believed this might be his last chance to show what he could do and up until the last meet of the season he was making good on that belief. "The premature end of the 2020 track season has affected me, my teammates, and all other athletes in their senior year because this is the last time we will ever get to run at this level," he said. Even though it's disappointing, frustrating, and sad for many; he feels it's important to take into account the long term perspective of the situation, to stay safe and to make the best of our circumstances.
Grant was injured most of his junior track season and they were looking forward to seeing him redeem himself this year. As disappointed as they are that they can't see his work rewarded, Grant completely understands that human lives are more important than a new PR in track. Knowing that he's headed to Oklahoma State in the fall to continue his running career has cushioned the blow for them. Grant feels the abrupt end to the season is disappointing also due to the fact that he cannot redeem himself from last year's injury, especially since his passion for running is at its highest right now. "I fell in love with the process of training very early in my career. My daily running activities are the best part of my day," Grant said.
"I began to cry, right there in my office for the first time since this whole thing began.....this wasn't the way senior track was supposed to end."Dana Embree
With the absence of official team practices and schooling, it's given him freedom with his running schedule and online academics. he's come to appreciate structure and scheduling throughout his day. Trying to stay in top shape, he does feel sorry for his family having to endure his healthy cooking. He said, "they have to smell it throughout the day, which can be a good thing or bad thing. Think fish, kale, and sweet potatoes......"
"It's fun to run fast and PR in races, but they don't fulfill me for very long. Consistently training gives me satisfaction; knowing that I'm getting closer to the best version of myself everyday." Even though he's not getting to showcase his hard work and dedication to running, he's very happy about being in the best physical shape of his young career.
Gabe was mad when TDF was cancelled and like any young person in their "I'm invincible stage" initially, felt this whole thing might have been blown way out of proportion. He refused to believe things wouldn't go back to normal. He continued to get up with the sun, train as hard (or harder) than ever and prayed for all of it to end. At first he and his buddies continued running together following the guidelines of under 10 people just so they could maintain a sense of normalcy and routine. There were six of them banding together, all seniors. This seemed to help each of them remain upbeat by doing something they loved and sharing a few laughs. The first sign of anger Dana saw from Gabe was a day when he was running solo on his high school track and a police officer told him that he had to leave. "I believe the anger was an indication of the deep grief he was feeling," she said. Since that day so much has changed for Gabe. He misses running with his "posse", but more than that he misses the deep sense of brotherhood that comes when you grind out the last few reps of a grueling workout with like minded teammates. As an only child, Gabe's teammates are everything to him. Being denied interaction with them (except the nightly PlayStation meet-ups) has been really hard on him and his parents.
According to Michael, "I was very disappointed when TDF was cancelled, but I'm grateful I got to run one more meet before the quarantine." When he realized his season might be over, he was even more disappointed. It's affected him because of goals he had for himself this year. He felt strong this year and was running some good times. He wanted the opportunity to run all three distance events at state. This hiatus has made him realize that nothing in life is guaranteed. "You have to make the most of each day because you never know what could happen tomorrow. Tomorrow might be the last day you could run or the last day you will be with your loved ones, so you must cherish every day," Michael said. Physically he says he is still putting in the work because if he doesn't, there is someone out there working harder than he is on any given day.
College Plans
On a positive note, Alexandria has already signed with the University of New Mexico. Mom feels as a family they are blessed to have this process already completed. This is an obstacle they don't have to overcome with the halt to the 2020 season. Planning for the future along with a set timeline is something they are struggling with as they don't know when to get plane tickets or even when she will start college. Luckily, Alexandria is a planner and prides herself on having things ready early so there will be no surprises. She has also been in constant contact with her college coaches for any updates.
Despite still being in high school, Grant is starting to make the mental transition to college running and is beyond excited to have the opportunity to run for Oklahoma State this fall. His advice for runners struggling during these hard and questionable times is to remember the "whys". He states, "I want all runners out there to really think about why they are running and why they continue to wake up every morning and train as hard as they do. Whenever you want to stop or quit at anything, remember why you've come so far."
Gabe will graduate high school with honors and will continue his pursuit of excellence at Abilene Christian University in the fall as a Presidential Scholar and Honors Scholar with the goal of preparing for medical school. He will also be joining their XC and track family driven by his desire to exceed expectations.
For Michael, the Abeytas are thankful he had his signing day early so that he got to have that experience. Mom tells us in closing, "with or without track season, he knows that he must continue to work and prepare for what's coming next fall when he becomes an Oregon Duck!"
Like many high school student athletes, Pablo isn't going to college to compete in varsity athletics. His competition days were prematurely ended, however, he will still be continuing his education. He will be attending Collin College for two years and then transferring to Texas A&M to study physical therapy.
Life goes on for these kids, their memories are their own, and their perseverance will forever be documented. One mom's thoughts on our turn of events is something we can all use, "Life is filled with curve balls. We can choose to give in and strike out or we can take what comes our way, swing for the fences and pray we connect in order to advance our runner. The Embrees choose the latter." Our country persevered and got through the tragedy of 9/11. Ironically, the class of 2020 is made up of kids who entered this world during a trying time in our country's history and maybe it's fitting that they're the ones ending their high school careers this way. Grant's mom said it very eloquently, "They're resilient and hopefully made the most of the time they had with teachers, coaches, classmates and friends. Of all the graduating classes, the theme of this one should be "carpe diem". Tomorrow is never promised, so living each day to the fullest is important."
There's nothing quite like a mother's love for her child. We are happy when they are happy, we hurt when they hurt, we rejoice when they succeed, we grieve when they face defeat and we try to fix anything we can to make things better for our children. There is one defeat that parents of the class of 2020 graduates are just about helpless at and that is having to watch the gravity of the effect COVID-19 is having on their children's lives. This is especially true for the track moms who couldn't fix the abrupt interruption of this track and field season for their senior athletes. Yes, they realize this is bigger than running, but these are their children.